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megpie71: 9th Doctor resting head against TARDIS with repeated *thunk* text (Default)
megpie71

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Wednesday, October 12th, 2011 11:08 am
So, you write male-male slashfic or yaoi. You're in the middle of writing something hot and heavy in third person (either third-person omniscient or third-person limited). You're referring to each of the characters with the pronoun "he" or "his" or "him".

Do you see a potential problem here?

(Hint: "He moaned as his throbbing prick was slowly inserted into him, inch by inch, stretching his tight arse to the limit."[1])

Can we say "subject-object confusion", kiddies? I knew we could.

Again, character names are useful things. They can prevent your readers from having to be jolted out of the moment by mental images of anatomy which just does not work like that.

(This rant brought to you by entirely too many slashfics where it seems the only way to determine what is being done with which to whom by whom is by backing up and re-reading the paragraph, maybe about three or four times.)

PS: Same rule/problem applies for female-female slash or yuri, just different pronouns. Please, just use the character's names.
PPS: This goes double or treble when you're dealing with more than two characters of the same pronoun-using gender in the same sexual act.
PPPS: Yes, this does still apply when one of the participants has tentacles.
PPPPs: It's also nice to see character names in het, too, particularly when gender games are being played.

[1] Not an actual quote, just a sentence made up on the spot to demonstrate the problem. Now, tell me which one of the characters is moaning, and why?
Wednesday, October 12th, 2011 05:33 am (UTC)
There is only one character, who is unnaturally well-endowed (and strangely hinged). Otherwise, there would've been names and stuff, right? Right?
Friday, October 14th, 2011 09:21 am (UTC)
At least it wasn't "stretching his tight ass to the limit"...