Scam - Advance Fee Fraud (419) Type

So I've decided to broaden my horizons a bit by dealing with the other popular type of scam landing in my email box - the "advance fee fraud". These are the ones which involve you being promised this huge sum of money (because Reasons), but if you reply to the email, you'll be asked to forward a bit of money yourself (maybe about $1000) to cover "administration costs" or "access fees" or whatever.

These frauds hope to hook you in using your greed, waving the large sum of money you could get tomorrow under your nose, and making you blind to the amount of money you'll wind up paying out today. The simplest way to deal with them is not to reply to them.

So, with that out of the way, let's look at the actual scam. I'll be putting these under a cut, because they tend to be long-winded. I've added in some comments - the original scam is in italics, while my stuff is in plain text.

( Scam below )

As always, the safest thing to do with these sorts of things is delete them on sight.